Ruff experiences...

Ever hear that old one, 'once bitten twice shy"....man I really need a rabies shot as I just keep messin' with the wrong dog....

dem bones...

The skeleton of an adult human is comprised of 206 bones.
But a little known fact is some have 207 bones, that extra bone is jealousy.

The only anomaly about me is a have an unusually large funny bone.....but not everyone can see it :-?

Call the thought police...

Do stupid people that go into police protective custody get put in the witless protection program?

hidden in plain sight....

The less you share of yourself, the more you give away about who you are....

opposites attract?

What is a double negative you ask?
It is a phrase containing two negatives.

It is not a blood type....

homeless.....

They say home is where your heart is....
I was recently and inexplicably evicted...

My experience has been....

"don't wear your heart on your sleeve, as I have many bullet wounds to prove that the target is usually missed with me"....

biting humor....

From the time I was able to write, I have cataloged so much in my life, and this is the first installment of such. I recently discovered some rather old 'jokes' I wrote as a child.
This one was written in the 4th grade.

What do you call Captain Hook when Dracula bites him?
A vampirate.

swimming with the sharks.....

Just know that as you sail through life, that even if you push me overboard in a friendship, I will keep swimming no matter how choppy the waters may be, just so I can follow you to make sure your cruise is a smooth one...and that I will always be there if you need help.....

In through the outbox...

Ok to respond to a few emails I have received.

Yes
No
Is that even possible?
Yes, I did post that
NO, absolutely not

My clean and honest answer to a dirty mind...

The famous Zen koan* (*philosophical riddle) asks, "What is the sound of one hand clapping?"

Just know that whilst you are reading this blog, it was created with the sound of one hand typing.

keep at arm's length...

The old adage is that one should, 'keep your friends close and your enemies even closer'.
That being said, many must consider me neutral....?

crime and bad pun-ishment...

People who duck giving straight answers, commit a fowl in my book....

The sound of one hand typing....

I have an exercise to offer for those who seek to take a step (or another step) on the path to enlightenment.
Here it is :
Write a one paragraph piece that would describe yourself to someone who does not know you (or even for someone who DOES think they know you).
But here's the catch, you must write this without using the following : I, my, me, mine.

stop and smell the flowers?

Random observations : The other day I thought, "man the way I repel women I should bottle my sweat and sell it as 'man-away', OR I could NOT buy the 2 for $1 deodorant at the Dollar Store...."

Drinking music anyone?

The latest song stuck in my head is 'Raise Your Glass' by Pink.

If nothing else, any song with the line : 'So raise your glass if you are wrong
In all the right ways' and a decent groove is cool in my book.

Wisdom from Sun Tzu

The book "The Art of War" By Sun Tzu truly contains so much wisdom. If one reads it with an open mind, you can extrapolate knowledge that can be applicable to even non 'war' situations.
Just a few genius insights from this fascinating book :
"Supreme excellence consists in breaking the enemy's resistance without fighting."
"The supreme art of war is to subdue the enemy without fighting."

Things I couldn't make up if I tried

From the I couldn't make this up department, my Dad once told my Mom when they were dating that although he really cared for her, that "he didn't know how things might go as bachelors run in his family"......

A shot to the dome...

The difference between confusion and delusion is one you admit to experiencing, whereas the other one others can point out to you...

Pending legal action...

I may have to take Ke$ha to court.
For I believe a line from her song "Tik ToK" was based upon me.
In the song she sings, "Before I leave brush my teeth with a bottle of Jack", she based that on the fact that I used to floss with a 5th of Wild Turkey...

Song stuck in my head....

The song stuck on replay in my head right now is Down (Candlelight remix) by Jay Sean....

Collateral damage avoidance...

THINK before you speak, for people who are always shooting their mouths off, usually end up with self inflicted wounds...

It's not what you have....

Materialism is about what you have (and what you may think you should have), Compassion is about what you have to offer others.

Monday's word of the day - mutiny

The word of the day for Monday is mutiny, which means "a rebellion against legal authority".
And as you are the captain of the ship, that is your life, chart a course for happiness, and let no one commit a mutiny that will divert you from reaching such your destination :)

whose next?

As my many posts reflect, I am not always the most savvy person.
Like when other children were playing 'doctor' and discovering the human body, I was the one in charge of taking insurance information and doing all the paperwork.

Think about it

If I could build a time machine that really worked, you wouldn't be reading this right now

Observations

You know how some women see a guy and say "He's hot"...they see me and think "God he's tepid"......

Working for a living....

Never get hurt at work, for in my experience most Insurance companies will send you to Dr.s who have taken the HYPOCRITICAL oathe...

Be willing to take a chance...

To be afraid to take a chance sometimes, is like wishing you'd win the lottery without buying a ticket.....
because by taking a chance you can sometimes also be giving yourself a chance....

Word of the day - misconception

Today's word is misconception, which means a mistaken thought, idea, or notion.
It is NOT the name of a stripper, least I don't think it is..?
Or maybe it might be the name of a woman who is VERY fertile...?